Realization

That it's not easy. It never has been, and it never will be.

That God is right there. Always has been, and always will be.

That things change. Always do, and always will.

That people change. Always can, always do, and always will.

But, I tell myself to be patient.

But, I tell myself to be kind.

And, I tell myself it will all work out the way it's supposed to.

And, the more I tell myself these things, the more I want to do frivolous things.

Things that only I, myself, can understand and continue to love myself unconditionally for.

This heartbreak is one I brought on myself. Until I talk to my one and only true love I will continue putting myself through this hell. This hell that never lets me stop thinking, eating, dreaming or sleeping. Maybe that's why I never make sense when I talk. Maybe that's why I have gained weight.Maybe that's why I wake up missing you. Maybe that's why my body never wants to stop sleeping. But, whether I'm awake or asleep; my mind always wanders to you, and to our memories, though few and far between, they burned into my memory. 

This video depicts us so much better. 
I've been searching for one, because we both 
know I have a hard time with expressing 
myself, and lyrics do it better than I
ever thought possible.
Be the best you can be, I love you.